Just like it sounds - it's a guard for your nards. And ladies, you got nards too. Don't get nardly, wrap one of these buggers around your stem to protect your junk if you get some unexpected forward momentum. Some of you might be thinking, "Oh, but I don't have any unexpected momentum in any direction." Shut up. You might need a Nard Guard just to protect yourself from your friends hecklin' your nards over how "good" you think you are.
Please allow 5-8 days for these pieces o' peace to be assembled.